Why Do the Wives Stand There, Next to Their Men?

NY Times:

Some of the Internet chatter on Tuesday suggested that Ms. Wall Spitzer’s silent presence at her husband’s side represented a dark day for feminism, with one writer railing, “Someone needs to tell his wife that ‘stand by your man’ does not apply here!!! … She needs to have some pride.”

But others turned the feminist argument on its head, detecting ample sexism in the notion that Ms. Wall Spitzer was dragged to the podium against her wishes.

“To me, a lot of this commentary seems patronizing to her,” said Suzanne B. Goldberg, a professor of law at Columbia University and director of its Sexuality and Gender Law Clinic. “She might have felt this was the best strategy in a terrible situation for protecting her children or her own reputation. We have no basis for assuming that she’s a mere pawn here.”

I agree with the latter perspective. She’s a strong woman and is likely making what she thinks is the right choice for her family.

This post sums it up nicely:

It is one thing to walk out on your husband privately, another in a public forum.  I give Silda a huge amount of credit for standing up their on the podium with her husband.  Time will tell what decisions she makes for her future and her childrens but I am not sure you can do anything after 25 years but step back and be very methodical.  After all, her husband certainly hadn’t been thinking with his head.  Believe me, I’d leave but it would be so incredibly painful that I am not sure I would be willing to not stand by my man, for my children, at least for the moment.

[Updated] And here’s Charlie’s take on it – LOL!!

Dear Future Wife (Whoever she may be)

If you should discover that, after decades of marriage and a meteoric career, I have spent $80k on high priced hookers, please dump my ass…

…right on the street…

…in public…

…right in the middle of my press conference.

Do not be supportive.  I do not deserve it.

Do not keep my kids around me.  They’d be better off if I wasn’t around.

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